Guns and Dildos

You wouldn’t believe some of the idiocy coming out of today’s anti-gun crowd.  Some of the stuff they come up with truly is laughable.  Take this gem from Raw Story:


Guns are like that dildo sitting in a box: They exist for no other purpose than to know you have one. Which is fundamentally silly, and much of the posturing and freaking out is, I suspect, an effort to live in denial of realizing how silly it is to be a gun nut.

“Guns are a tool.” It’s the mantra of gun lovers. But in order for a thing to be a “tool”, you need to use it. The problem is that the function of a gun is to kill people. Unfortunately for gun nuts, murder is illegal. The only, in theory anyway, legal reason to kill someone is self-defense. But, realistically speaking, the “opportunity” for self-defense simply doesn’t come up that often. The gun industry lobby would love you to believe people are banging doors down all the time and, if you are patient, one day that gun will come in handy. But I think most gun nuts know, deep down inside, that the odds that they will ever use their tool for what it’s meant for are very low. Most of us simply will never have a legitimate reason to kill someone. No big surprise that some assholes, like George Zimmerman and Byron Smith, therefore go out of their way to create “self-defense” scenarios so that gun goes to use.

Even dumber are the people, who are the majority of gun owners now, that the industry has bamboozled into buying multiple guns. The odds of firing one into a live human being are low. The odds of using every gun you own that way are basically nil.


It takes a lot of dumb to call other people dumb simply because they want to be prepared (and to call them misogynists just to deflect criticism, but that’s a different topic).  I keep several fire extinguishers in my home, yet to date, I have never had a fire break out.  Does the fact that I have yet to have the immediate need for a fire extinguisher make me “dumb” for keeping them in my home?  And yet, I know that fire in the home is a possibility, so I do what I can to be prepared to keep my family safe.  It’s better than the alternative of rushing off to the store to buy a fire extinguisher as my home burns down.

I keep a gun next to my bed for the same reasons.  Like a house fire, it is entirely possible that, at some point, my home will be broken into – it happens to thousands of homes every day.  If or when that happens, I would very much prefer to be able to defend myself with more than just the lamp on my nightstand.

The assertion made by this anti-gun wacko that “the ‘opportunity’ for self-defense simply doesn’t come up that often” is patently ridiculous – a simple Google search shows that guns are used by law-abiding citizens to defend themselves from criminals each and every day – dozens, if not hundreds of times per day.  It doesn’t help that in many towns and cities, it can take police anywhere from 15 minutes to over an hour to respond to an emergency call.

The other thing that makes this person’s rant idiotic is the simple fact that guns are tools.  I own more than one gun, and I use those guns for more than a single purpose.  I have handguns for self-defense purposes, but I also train regularly at the range, an activity that provides great stress relief in addition to improving my accuracy.  Shotguns can be used for hunting, sport shooting, or home defense.  I own one of those scary black AR-15 “assault” rifles, but it, too, can be used for home defense, hunting, or sport shooting.

The gun industry hasn’t “bamboozled” me into buying anything – different tools have different uses…just like sex toys.


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